“To everything turn, turn, turn…” – From the song “Turn, Turn, Turn” by Pete Seeger (1954) adapted from the book of Ecclesiastes.
This song comes to mind for today. I have little physical energy, clarity of mind, or enthusiasm. In the past, I would have bulldozed my way to be active and productive. Now, I surrender to Spirit Who knows that I need to rest. I have no choice but to listen to Spirit.
I am grateful that I do not have a j-o-b I had to get to. Being in my own business, I make my own schedule, and it allows for supreme flexibility.
It is a loving action on my part to take time to rest; it is trusting action for me to surrender to God, knowing there is a time for everything. Today is a time for rest.
Rog and I are really feeling stuck. We simply do not know what God’s plan is for us. We go about our day with plenty of work of various sorts keeping us busy and fulfilled to varying degrees. But we know much of it is not our true work. Still, we don’t know for sure what Spirit would like us to be doing. And, we continue to be eager to move to a smaller, more rural community and start what we think to be our new life.
So last night together we sat in the Silence seeking answers from Spirit enveloped by soft candlelight, holding hands. Each time I awoke in the middle of the night, I had on my mind “Sprit, please tell me what You want, what Your plans are for me, for us…”
And, this morning, my alone time had me asking Spirit question-after-question about what Its Will for me and for us is. This is something I’ve not seemed to have done in a very long time. Usually I am easing the chatter for messages to come through or I’m sending messages out in a variety of modalities (prayer, affirmation). This time I was seeking a dialogue, you know, a là Neal Donald Walsch (of “Conversations with God” fame).
I got some replies back to my questions. I’m not sure if they came from Spirit or from Ego. I tend to think that they came from Spirit because I think Ego would have come up with some more appealing and dramatic ones.
At this time, I believe Spirit wants me to be patient, to continue growing closer to God, to increase my capacity to ask and then do Thy Will, not mine. It’s about surrender, it’s about trust. It’s about just Being and being in the Now.
I’ll keep on asking and talking with God, knowing that more will be revealed of the Divine Plan when the time is correct. For today, this rests well with me and I am at peace.
Over the years, I’ve heard the Bible quote “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God” (John 1:1). But I’ve also heard that the word “logos”, from which “word” comes from, can be translated to “thought”. Hence, we then get “In the beginning was the Thought, and the Thought was with God, and the Thought was God.” Thoughts are pretty powerful, I’d say.
A Chinese proverb states: “Be careful of your thoughts, for your thoughts inspire your words. Be careful of your words, for your words precede your actions. Be careful of your actions, for your actions become your habits. Be careful of your habits, for your habits build your character. Be careful of your character, for your character decides your destiny.”
How true, how true.
Today’s reading contained In God’s Care reminds me that “Although it takes practice to remember to let our Higher Power direct our actions, it will become a habit in time – the healthiest habit we’ll ever develop.”
This is the primary habit for me to cultivate – once again. Sometimes I’m really present, checking in with Spirit, regularly asking for guidance and the willingness with the ability to carry it out. Sometimes, (like yesterday – see blog), I am so wrapped up in minutiae that the greater – and more important – issue of what is God’s Will is taken over by my ego.
If I am to develop healthy habits that ultimately affect my destiny, then there is no doubt I must think about and commune with Spirit. I must be in constant contact with my Higher Power, which this action in and of itself will help me to develop healthy thoughts, words, actions, habits, character, and finally, my destiny. It’s a loop.
“Trust God or worry. Those are the two choices you have in every situation. Trust God and be at peace. Worry and experience stress. Your choices are that simple and you will make your life as peaceful or stressful as you choose to make it. Trust God and be at peace. This is all that is asked of you.” – James Blanchard Cisneros
Well, I clearly was feeling worried, stressed, and not at peace. I was still in the research stage in a project, not knowing how long it was going to take me to actually start designing the project, and concerned about keeping my commitment to agreed upon goal dates with my client. Ego had clearly ‘eased God out’ and I was a wreck. Impatient with Rog, impatient with myself, with my body all tensed up.
I took some steps to help myself calm down, one in the form of checking in with my client and communicating my concerns. But I didn’t pause to check in with Spirit. I didn’t stop and say “God needs to be first, then all else will follow with ease and grace.”
Still, somehow God got through to me. I realized that I was doing everything I could and it was going to have to be enough. My peace was too important to keep on keeping on in this unhealthy, workaholic type of state, with ego having a field day. I surrendered. I was backing to trusting God.
Thank You, Spirit, for getting through to me even when I feel so closed and bound up.
Today I’ve really been thinking about this business of doing God’s will. Ya know, “Thy Will, not mine, be done.” I wonder how much I really believe in that principle and how much I put it into action.
I have been given free will to live my life, to make choices, and the ‘proper’ use of it is to align it with what Spirit would have me do. But when my ego gets in the way, fugetaboutit! Does that mean every time my ego is going, I’m not doing God’s will?
I figure that if I’m doing God’s Will, it doesn’t really matter what is going on in my life. It’s just that simple. And, then I’m in a perpetual state of joy. Sounds good to me. Although somehow it doesn’t seem that easy… I cannot say that I feel joy most of the time, let alone perpetually. [Have you seen this world lately?] Hence, I’m out of alignment with Spirit.
For now, I’ll meditate on it, pray, and contemplate it. This is a huge issue with far reaching ramifications in my life, and definitely worth attention.
This week has been one in which I’ve asked God for help quite often…
Help to feel more energized… the right words to express to someone what I’m feeling in a diplomatic way… safe travel for myself and everyone else on the road… successful completion of new computer program tasks with ease and grace… surrender in the midst of frustration.
It’s a comfort to no longer feel alone, to know I have an ever-present Power to call on at all times, for all things.
It was a week of acknowledging Spirit’s Presence more and more, even if it was in the form of asking for help.
After another night of burning the midnight oil to work on a client’s project, I awoke far from rested. Having scheduled a morning business meeting with this same client, sleeping late was not an option.
What to do? Ahhhh – I remembered to call on Spirit for help! “What a concept,” a statement my OA buddy Kathleen expressed years ago that has been forever etched in my mind’s eye.
So first I said a prayer and then I started breathing deeply with a firm intention to affect a positive change in my energy level. This was a somewhat new experiment for me, and the results were awesome. I got this physical body enlivened and simultaneously got more connected to God. In very little time I was back in shape physically and spiritually.
How truly amazing the power of God is! All it takes is to remember to ask for help – what a concept, indeed.
There are a number of qualities I’ve cultivated in my years in 12 Step program which were introduced to me vis-à-vis my addiction. As times passes by, I am grateful to see how very often I apply them in my daily life. Things like patience, perseverance, humility, honesty, faith, etc.; these are principles that sum up each of the 12 Steps.
In providing computer-related services to clients, there are times when I get hung up in my work. It could be due to my own lack of knowledge and experience or a glitch in the software I am using. Most everyone knows how computers can be: you can’t live with them and you can’t live without them!
Over a quick lunch break today, Rog was kind enough to let me vent some of the issues I was wrestling with on my current project, for which I’ve been burning the midnight oil on and is due tomorrow. I told him that although they’re frustrating and costing me precious time, in a way I’m still pretty calm. Rog said, “You mean, like you’re not ready to throw the computer out the window yet,” a situation that he knows I’ve coached clients with.
Wow – yeah, that’s right, I’m not ready to throw the computer out the window yet. I’ve still got patience left in me. My perseverance is strong. I am humble and know I don’t have to be perfect. I can be honest and admit my weaknesses. I have numerous resources to go to for help. Perhaps mainly I’m in this space because these days I know I’m not alone.
I’ll say a specific prayer to Spirit before I go back to this project. And, I’ll have confidence that between God, my positive attitude, and the software vendor’s customer service, my work will unfold with ease and grace.
Thank you, Bill Wilson, Dr. Bob, and Spirit for the gift of a way of life that helps me in all matters, paving the way for me to be “happy, joyous, and free.”
Some client/friends of ours referred a close friend of theirs to us to build his website. Bill and I hit it off immediately, then strengthened the comfortable connection by confirming that we were both friends of Bill Wilson. Our first phone conversation lasted 45 minutes.
When Rog and I met Bill in person, it was another meaningful conversation, building a business as well as social relationship. The three of us work great as a team and even though it may be Bill and his wife Catherine’s business, we feel like we are part of it and their family.
Family… Rog is family along with an aunt, uncle, and cousin back in the Big Apple. Add a few close friends who are not local, and my family is pretty small. When I add in my OA family it’s bigger, and with 12 Step folks in general, it’s huge. I am blessed.
Family… Well, you see, while Bill is American, Catherine is French. With her family members living in France, a few years ago the couple decided to leave America, and settle on a farm in the south of France. Their homestead is the natural gathering place for Catherine’s family.
Bill has been in the States a lot during the last three years, handling financial and business matters so that he can truly transition to life as a Frenchman. Bill had plans to fly back to France today for a family reunion on Catherine’s side and then return to the States within the week. But being away so much from his beloved wife and children has taken its toll, and with business matters pretty much settled, now it has been decided that Bill will remain with his family, his home in France. Little did he know that the family reunion he was going to would turn out to be his own! I’m so happy for them all.
Some people we meet feel like family and it’s probably because in some past lifetime they were! I feel Bill is like a sib, and we both agree that it’s probably because we were family members in the past. I will miss his physical presence here, but thanks to email we’ll easily stay connected. Besides, we have his website to work on!
If it hadn’t been for us moving into web work, our friends contracting with us to design their sites, and then their referring Bill to us, we’d never have met Bill. With little time left to connect unbeknownst to us all, Bill and I connected over such a thing as websites.
Spirit can and will do anything to get people connected, and in this case it was just in the nick of time. It was no coincidence, but a carefully orchestrated plan to get family members reconnected. I am so grateful. Thank You, Spirit!
I had been working with a government employee regarding a social service situation and in my last written correspondence had closed with “God bless.” Somehow I felt that in his line of work he’d appreciate it. I didn’t know how ‘appropriate’ it was, especially in a quasi-business realm, but figured what’s the worse that could happen.
I know as a former atheist whenever someone directed the G-word at me, I cringed. And, in those days, no one would have expressed that in a business situation especially.
But times are different and I am different. Yesterday, as we closed our telephone conversation about the positive outcome of my request, and I thanked him for all his help, Manuel said “God bless you.” Amid my chills, I responded emphatically, “No, God bless you!” I was so touched by his reaching out in that way and felt so close to Spirit. And, even now when I think back on it, I feel tickled by Spirit.
I and the people around me have come a long way. More people are wearing their spirituality on their sleeve and that can only have a positive effect on the world. Every reminder to me throughout the day of The Presence is greatly appreciated. And, every prayerful greeting is terrific icing on the cake.
Make we offer words of blessing to one other as we go about our day, knowing God the Father is with each and every one of us.
